A preacher was running late when he pulled into a full-service gas station for fuel. A little guy came out from office. He had a hat pulled down low, his face was covered with acne, his hair was greasy, and his pants were so large he had to keep pulling them up. The guy spoke poorly and slowly. It seemed to take forever for him to pump the gas.
When the preacher gave him his credit card, it took several minutes before he came back to say they didn’t accept that card. The preacher then gave him another card only to learn after several more minutes that it didn’t work. Finally in desperation, he asked, “Do you still take cash?” The little fellow then took several more minutes to make change and return it. The preacher was so furious when he left that he backed up and spun his tires as he left the station!
A few blocks away, the Holy Spirit began to convict him about his impatience and rudeness to the attendant. He drove back up and the little guy was too scared to come out of the office! Finally, the preacher said to him, “I’m really sorry for the way I treated you.” The attendant pushed back his hat and said, “That’s okay mister. Everybody treats me that way.”
We live in a cold and impersonal world in which many can echo that statement, “Everybody treats me that way.” What is sad is that sentiment is all too often echoed in the church, which ought to be a haven from the coldness of society. We as a church are called to be different as a result of our relationship with Jesus Christ. One thing that should identify us as a church is being a caring community.
This morning we are continuing on in our series “Our church is …” Remember, this is a series on our identity as a church – who we are and who we should be. These are characteristics/core values that will make us a healthy church that will have a great impact on our community. So far we have looked at these characteristics/core values “Our church is … committed to one another.” That means we are united – we resolve our conflicts in God honouring ways. We looked at “Our church is … authentic.” That means we need to sincere and genuine and we looked at some ways we can live that way. Then 2 weeks ago we looked at “Our church is … growing in Christlikness.” That means we are becoming more and more like Christ. We take on Christ’s values, Christ’s attitude and Christ’s character.
Today we are going to look at this characteristic: Our church is … caring. If we are to fulfill our mission of making disciples we must be a caring community. We must care about both fellow believers in the church as well as those who have not yet come into a relationship with God. This morning we are going to look at 4 practical things we can do to care for others by using the acronym C.A.R.E.
The first way we can care for others is by exhibiting COMPASSION. Colossians 3:12 says: “There as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Compassion is defined as a sympathetic consciousness of others distress together with a desire to alleviate it. Often we read in the gospels of Christ’s compassion towards the multitudes and individual sufferers. The Greek word used for “compassion” originally referred to the inner parts of a man, the heart, liver, and so on. It became common to use this word in reference to the lower parts of the abdomen, the intestines, and especially the womb. The word brings to mind the physical feeling associated with compassion. Literally it is identifying with another’s distress so that one feels it in their guts. It means to feel the other person’s pain so that it prompts us to try to do something to make the situation better.
Compassion counteracts apathy. Here’s a definition of apathy: It’s a lack of emotion or concern, especially when it relates to matters of general concern. An Irish author, George Bernard Shaw said,
“The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that’s the essence of inhumanity.”
We don’t have to look too far to see apathetic people in our world. But apathy has no place in the body of Christ! Apathy paralyzes the body of Christ. Apathy urges us to avoid those who need us. Apathy makes us lose sight of the Kingdom. Apathy neutralizes our effectiveness in the Kingdom. We are called to have the transforming love and compassion of Jesus Christ. We are called to practice compassion. We need to seek out those every day situations that call for compassion.
Here are a few ideas: Take your friend’s kids so they can have some time to themselves after a tough day or week. Cook a meal for a family with a loved one in the hospital.
A second way we can care for others is by being ATTENTIVE. People want to know that they are somebody and that someone will pay attention to them. In the book of Matthew a story is told of a Canaanite woman whose daughter was suffering terribly from demon-possession and she wanted Jesus’ attention. Unfortunately, the disciples wanted to get away from her. They felt that both Christ and they had more important and more pressing things to do. They didn’t have time to listen to her. But Jesus took time to talk with her. He gave her His attention.
There is another incident in the book of Luke where Jesus was attentive. People were bringing babies to Jesus to have Him touch them. When the disciples saw this they rebuked these parents who wanted Jesus’ blessing on their children Jesus’ response to this as recorded in Luke 18: 16 was “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” Someone once said, “People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care.”
I think one of the best ways that we can be attentive to others is by being active listeners. Sadly, many people today are not good listeners. They are too busy thinking of what they will say next or they are distracted by other things or they just don’t care. We live in world where we have e-mail, phones, cell-phones, faxes, text-messaging, etc and still we don’t listen well, we tune out. The truth is that many people are longing to find someone who will listen to them. David Augsburger said: “Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable.” If we want to be a caring community then we need be students of the art and science of listening. When someone is talking to us we need to give them our full attention.
We give someone our full attention by looking them in the eyes. When we are listening to someone we need to make eye-to-eye contact, instead of looking elsewhere. We need to pay attention to the other person.When we make eye contact we are saying, “I am here to listen”. Eye contact tells the other person that we are interested in really hearing them. It shows that we are not distracted; that we are tuning in.
Also, we give someone our full attention by not interrupting them. I know that I can be an interrupter at times. This is something that I am working hard at stopping in my life. When we are listening to someone we need to make a conscious effort not to respond, even in our heads, till the other person has finished talking. James 1:19 says: “Be quick to listen, slow to speak.” We need to be truly attentive, and hear completely, so that we can respond with our heart and not just our heads! People want to know we care. People want to be understood. Henri Nouwen said: “To care means first of all to be present to each other.” Give people your full attention and they will know that you care!
A third way we can care for others by REMEMBERING them. Philippians 2:4 tells us to not only look at our own interests but we should be looking out for the interests of others. Every community has a variety of persons who are among the “forgotten” – forgotten by all or most people. I want to read a poem that was written by a young girl who committed suicide several years ago. Perhaps if the people surrounding her had shown a little more love, and had paid more attention to her, her death could have been prevented. The poem is titled, “The Greatest Pain in Life”
The greatest pain in life
is not to die,
but to be ignored.
To lose the person you love so much
to another who doesn’t care at all.
To have someone you care so about so much
throw a party…
and not tell you about it.
When your favourite person on earth
neglects to invite you to his graduation.
To have people think that you don’t care.
The greatest pain in life,
is not to die,
but to be forgotten.
To be left in the dust after another’s great achievement.
To never get a call from a friend,
just saying “hi”.
When you show someone your innermost thoughts
and they laugh in your face.
For friends to always be
too busy to console you
when you need someone to lift your spirits.
When it seems like the only person who cares about you,
is you.
Life is full of pain,
but does it ever get better?
Will people ever care about each other,
and make time for those who are in need?
Each of us has a part to play
in this great show we call life.
Each of us has a duty to mankind
to tell our friends we love them.
If you do not care about your friends
you will not be punished.
You will simply be ignored…
forgotten…
as you have done to others.
Remember that when going through life, we can’t judge a sad or lonely person just by their facial expressions. We need to get to know each person we come in contact with, cherish our friendship with them, and show them that we care by remembering them. Care for others by taking time to remember them. Call someone this week that haven’t talked to for a while.
A final way we can care for others by providing ENCOURAGEMENT. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” Someone once said, “A pat on the back is only a few vertebrae removed from a kick in the pants, but is miles ahead in results”. Encouragement is building someone up. Encouragement is recognizing something good in someone. Encouragement is saying a kind word when someone is feeling down. Encouragement doesn’t take any special talent; everyone can do it. We all have a huge “encouragement bank” from which we can withdraw to share with others.
ENCOURAGEMENT CHANGES PEOPLE. When you and I encourage others as a habit we counter negativity, bitterness and complaining. We bring hope, healing and comfort. In short, we bring positive changes into our world and the world of people around us. Look for ways to encourage people this week. Write someone a note to tell them that you are praying for them. Tell someone how they encouraged you. Tell someone how much you appreciate them. Care for others by providing encouragement!
As we conclude this morning I want to read another poem. It is called “Does anyone care?” It says:
The ache is there, does anyone really care?
The tears they fall, they fall to deaf ears,
Does anybody see our breaking heart
Or care to understand and do their part?
The ache is there, does anyone really care?
We beg and plead, and our souls we bare,
We tell them exactly what we need
But instead of helping they stand and watch us bleed.
The ache is there, does anyone really care?
If only they knew, If only they would dare
To reach out and listen or touch our hand.
Don’t they see we are in sinking sand?
The ache is there, does anyone really care?
Yet I finally found one so rare,
The one who would dare to stand
To be that listening ear and lend a hand.
Will the rest dare to understand
Or learn to reach out their hand?
The ache is there, does anyone really care?
Let’s be a church that cares. Let’s be a caring community. Let’s exhibit compassion so that people know we feel their pain. Let’s be attentive to others by being active listeners. Let make sure that people know that we remember them – that we haven’t forgot about them. Let’s be people who provide encouragement.
Here’s the challenge I want to leave for us: Look for ways to demonstrate care this week! Ask God to open your eyes to those opportunities!
